If stress; failures, setbacks and difficult challenges were part of your experience in 2004 what can you do to prepare for the road ahead in 2005? As a priest, psychotherapist and major superior one of the most frequently asked questions I receive is: "How do you manage stress?"

I believe managing stress is a valid and necessary concern for anyone in the helping professions especially religious/clergy who today tend to be over scheduled and over-stressed. However, I find that religious/clergy often find themselves on the wrong end of the equation when it comes to dealing with stress, anxiety and challenges, etc. More often than not they are more focused on changing the environment (I. e., the things causing stress and anxiety) than developing effective coping skills for dealing with difficulty.

Many of us in the helping professions have inquired about how to help ourselves deal more effectively with anxiety, stress and challenges. Unfortunately we often approach this issue with the hidden agenda of dealing with difficulties in a way that enables us to perform and achieve at I believe that our focus should not be on making the world a less stressful challenging, or scary place. Nor do I believe that we should seek help primarily to maximize our performance. I suggest that we focus our efforts instead on helping ourselves and others to develop resilience in response to adversity, challenge, anxiety and stress.

Let's face it - as much as we would like to be protected from difficulties, we simply cannot. I wish we could find a Neverland free from stress, fear, adversity and unfairness, etc. However the world we live and minister in is full of all of these. There is no community we can move to or environment we can create that will shield us from difficulties we are sure to encounter. Jesus warned his disciples of the problems of the world: These things I have spoken to you that in Me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation; but be of good cheer, I have overcome the world (John 16:33).

There is a lot of focus these days to get religious/clergy to feel good about themselves. However, research is showing that self-esteem is not necessarily the path to fulfillment. Self esteem seems to correlate to how well a person is doing in the world rather than a determinant. Even though self-esteem is important it is a mistake to make it the main focus as the cure for problems. It is more important to focus on resilience as a response to adversity. I would like to suggest that developing resiliency is one of the most important tasks of formation to function effectively and competently in ministry. In fact resilience may be more important than IQ, raw talent, education, who you know, etc., in predicting effective coping in life.

If resilience is so important, what can we do to develop this important quality? First we need to allow ourselves to be exposed to appropriate levels of difficulty and challenge, adversity and stress, in order to allow ourselves to develop "the muscle" of resilience. The characteristic of resilience is one that is developed only through experience. When we treat ourselves like a cruise ship that must reach its destination - fulfillment - smoothly, without even the slightest bump or wave, we are deceiving ourselves. The bumps are part of the divine plan! By giving ourselves the chance to survive some danger and to allow ourselves to survive some reckless or thoughtless choices we learn how to withstand bumps and knocks! This is part of the path to becoming a mature, resilient adult.

Dr. Martin Seligman, Ph.D. describes the resilient type in his book Learned Optimism. He states, "Life inflicts the same setbacks and tragedies on the optimist as on the pessimist, but the optimist weathers them better. An optimistic outlook enables one to bounce back from defeat and pick up and start over again. The pessimist gives up and falls into depression. Because of one's resilience, an optimistic person achieves more at work and play, has better physical health and may even live longer.

I would like to suggest that the concept of resilience is a spiritual principle of Plentiful Redemption. Rick Warren in his book, The Purpose Driven Life, states that, "Every problem is a character-building opportunity, and the more difficult it is, the greater the potential for building spiritual muscle and moral fiber." An important Alphonsian perspective on resiliency is best stated in James 1:2 - 4: Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be complete, not lacking anything.

Plentiful Redemption does not mean that life in this world is a trouble free journey. On the contrary we know from experience that life in fact brings tribulation. Jesus promises that I am with you always even to the end of the age (Matthew 28:20). The ability to approach fearful challenging and stressful circumstances with the assurance that God is with us and to deal effectively with whatever situation we encounter is to live Plentiful Redemption Redemptorists face a future that demands that we do not shrink from challenges or be paralyzed by fear. We will be challenged to try new things even when we are uncertain of success because failure is the opportunity to learn. Resilient Redemptorists know they can bounce back from defeat and approach the next challenge wiser and more experienced. With this in mind I wish you a Resilient and Happy New Year! Be of good cheer!